by Mayumi-H | Aug 22, 2012 | Fearless, Short Stories
Week 55 of the 100-Word Challenge for Grown-Ups (over at Julia’s Place) was a picture prompt of a ridiculous cat wearing a wig and glasses. Julia asked that we write a piece to go along with this picture (it doesn’t have to be 100 words). For me, I couldn’t get out of my head the ridiculousness of a greeting card like that…and how inappropriate it can sometimes be for a situation.
I’ve decided not to submit to this week’s 100 WCGU link list, because I’m not following the rules posted (my flash fiction doesn’t really go along with this picture at all). But I couldn’t let this sit on my hard drive unpublished, either. Hopefully, you don’t fault me for that.
“What a Way”
She twisted her ring, slowly. It stopped hurting, but the imprint remained, where he’d squeezed too hard with unloosed passion.
Such passion…! More than she’d bargained when she’d singled him out, on those quiet, twilit dunes. She’d thought him just a beautiful blond boy, a simple pleasure to pass the time. Who’d have guessed he’d be so…emotional? But those words, breathed longingly beside her ear:
“I love you.”
It had to end. He was too young. She was too…married.
Beside her, an advert caught her eye.
“Say it with a card.”
She sniffed. What a way to break his heart.
Ouch, Susanna. Just…ouch.
But, don’t let me depress you! Do go over to this week’s 100 WCGU site and check out some of the delightfully funny stories there!
by Mayumi-H | Aug 20, 2012 | Fearless, From Hell (A Love Story)
The other day, I couldn’t get a scene to work. This happens on a lot of days, actually, but this particular one was just grinding away at me. It was so frustrating, I wanted to just throw my laptop across the room and give up, say, To Hell with it, and let the story wither in my archives, like so many others.
Then, I received this message:
…[H]ow you describe the struggles of the main characters dealing with overcoming there [sic] personal issues and the physical issues of someone who has been confined to a wheel chair…is spot on. I really appreciate and admire how you got the pain and issues that are both physical and mental correctly for both characters.
After reading that, I felt awesome.
It’s easy for me to write facts. It’s also easy, sometimes, for me to write dialogue. And characters, and plot. But emotion made true – that’s where I pour a lot of my energies. It’s what I enjoy about stories (the conflicts of personalities), and it’s one part of my writing I try to do well. For that, I dig deep, into my own experiences, doubts, thoughts, heartaches.
So, when a reader – even a beta – comes back to me and says, Damn, girl, you got that right, it makes me think maybe I can do this, maybe this story is worth sharing beyond digital clippings and drafts passed to pals. And I sat back down and cleared my head…and the scene worked.
There’s still a long road ahead of me (revisions, edits, queries), but I’ll always keep that feedback pinned close to my desk, for the next time someone makes me feel like my writing is shit.
“Spot on.” Hell, yeah!
What keeps you writing your story?
by Mayumi-H | Aug 13, 2012 | Excerpts, Fearless, Persona 4 Fan Fiction, Process
As much as I enjoy delving into the heady depths of a good romance, one of my favorite parts of examining relationships is the dance of early affection between two characters. While not necessarily innocent (especially from a player’s point of view), it’s often full of a plain and refreshing simplicity:
![By A. Barra (Own work) [GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) or CC-BY-SA-3.0-2.5-2.0-1.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons](https://mayumi.amorphous.press/wp-content/uploads/sites/4/2012/08/320px-iris_dancers_veil.jpg?w=300 "320px-Iris_'Dancer's_Veil'")
They simply walked and talked: about the streets and shops, at first, but – as the steps wore on – about less random and more personal things. Such as the kinds of music they liked (she enjoyed an eclectic mix of dance hall, pop, and classical, while he favoured straight-up guitar rock, funk, and electronica), to what sorts of television programmes they preferred (she swooned over period masterpieces with the same affection he held for episodic science fiction, though they were both fans of detective dramas of any sort), to what foods they liked to eat (he was a lenient vegetarian, whereas she adored rare steak…but both of them found tandoori takeaway too scrumptious to ever pass up).
All along the way, Ross found himself becoming more and more curious about discovering what made pretty, perky, adorably sexy Amber Baelin tick, that he almost forgot how easily she could set his nerves on fire. Until they approached the heavy wooden door of the narrow two-storey row house she called home, that is, because it meant their time together was over.
I’ve occasionally spent a good deal of time with two would-be or could-be lovers breaking through the initial barriers of mutual ignorance. But, for this story, I felt the time would be better spent on the more pressing conflicts of self-doubt, past heartaches, and unexpected physical limitations. Still, it’s always fun to imagine how two characters can come together.
Someone might say that this is too much outright “telling” for a story. As for me, I like to think these smaller details are just icing on a bigger cake I’m trying to “show.”
How do you approach the blossoming of love in your stories? Or, do you think it’s just a bunch of rubbish, and bring on the bodycount?
by Mayumi-H | Jul 30, 2012 | Excerpts, Fearless, Process
A friend of mine asked to read my latest project, which happens to be Fearless. I don’t usually share my work with people I trust so early in the game, but I offered him the first two (draft) chapters, mostly just to shut him up.
It didn’t.
What I got back was an earful. He made some good points, but this had to be my favorite critique: The best friend is more likable than the hero. To quote: “Your hero’s a jerk.”
That one actually made me grin. Because yes, he is. But, that’s a big part of the story.
One of the things I love about my main characters is that they’re flawed. Some more than others, of course, but I try to help them all grow. That’s the beautiful thing about heroes and heroines. They’re like you and me (sometimes scarily so), but, over the course of the story, they push themselves to be better people. They don’t always get what they want, but they’re stronger men and women for the effort.
Which is why it’s so much fun to write them as jerks in the beginning:
Ross felt a grin creep to his face. Then he raised his free arm and called out, “Mornin’, Beth!”
Neville clicked his tongue, muttering, “Grow up.”
Ross ignored him, swinging his board up as he approached both fruit and filly. He bent his head, offering the Crispins’ youngest daughter a leering smile. “You look as scrumptious as those apples!” he told her.
Beth laughed and blushed bright red under her kerchief. “Thank you,” she said, her voice mostly squeal.
It took some effort for Ross to keep his smile in place; hopefully, that voice would one day mature as nicely as her tits had already done. Still, he wasn’t interested in her, just the apples, so he offered her a charming flare of his nostrils and asked, “Think you could let us have a taste?”
What do you like best about your main character(s)? Are they the ones who grow over the story, or do they spur the growth in others?
by Mayumi-H | Jul 16, 2012 | Excerpts, Fearless, Process
In photography and cinematography, forced perspective is a technique that uses optical illusion to make an object look closer/larger or farther away/smaller than it actually is.
But this post is not about that sort of forced perspective.
I like to tell stories from a particular character’s viewpoint. I enjoy sticking with that one character through the chapter (or story), and relating his or her feelings to the reader through events, dialogue, and description. But everything that is seen, heard, or experienced in the story is how it relates to that particular character. An over-the-shoulder perspective, if you will.
I hate narratives that jump around from perspective to perspective – especially within a single chapter! – because it tends to leave me feeling like just an observer, and less invested in what’s happening to those characters. Some writers can get away with this multiple-perspective technique. It’s hard for me, though.
Get invested with your characters. Keep them close.
I like learning about a character through their triumphs and tragedies. Even though I know where that character will end up (usually), I love learning about him or her through telling their story. Perhaps it’s a crutch to fall into the same storytelling style for most of my work, but it’s also what I enjoy.
Here’s an example of what I mean:
She wasn’t the cool, salty sea that had filled his waking and dreaming senses from the moment of his birth, that much was true. She couldn’t slip frictionless through his fingers, or buoy him through careless mistakes that sent him tumbling from his board, or let him glide across her blue depths, like a bird skimming the tips of its wings through the froth.
But then, the sea didn’t warm him on chilled nights. It didn’t smell like jasmine or strawberries or mint, depending on its mood. It didn’t change its taste, either, from cool and creamy, to hot and bitter, and anything in between. And it couldn’t fill his arms, so soft and supple and warm, or cuddle him close in return. Amber was the only one who could do that.
Amber was the only one he wanted to do that.
I don’t think I could tell the same story I want to tell using a different narrative technique. Readers might want to know what’s going on in another character’s head, but I like keeping a bit of mystery. I go through my own life not knowing what other people think. Why not write stories the same way?
What’s your preferred storytelling perspective? Why?
![By A. Barra (Own work) [GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) or CC-BY-SA-3.0-2.5-2.0-1.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons](http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Iris_%27Dancer%27s_Veil%27.JPG "320px-Iris_'Dancer's_Veil'")
![Brocken Inaglory [CC-BY-SA-3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0) or GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html)], via Wikimedia Commons](http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3AFalling_surfer.jpg)
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