“A Little Sliver of Nirvana”
Wading through the sea of boozehounds and whores pressing flesh and passing money, an unending rolling tide of vice and greed, he settled in to the corner booth, the one with the well-worn center cushion seat and the uneven grooves in the grain where metal stiletto heels had tread for too many nights. He clicked the control pad beside his seat, prompting the silencing swish of the heavy velvet shroud, and sat back, closing his eyes in the dim dank, to wait.
A flutter of music – high winds with low brass, though more than that he couldn’t tell – made him breathe deep, the scent of soap and lilies filling his nose, erasing the thick stench of sweat and despair. And, looking up, now, he saw her: legs shifting, hips rolling, belly and breasts shining with some invisible light; arms swaying, hair swinging, lips and eyes focused on him, holding him in the trance of her magic-making for as long as they both could stand it, this little sliver of Nirvana.
Slowing at the whisper of the final chords, she frowned, reaching out to him – forbidden, but she’d never cared – to touch his face, when he grabbed her wrist with one hand and slapped the other on the space of table between them, around a treasured bundle of cash, and murmured, “Marry me, now?”
Today’s original fiction piece inspired by this week’s Five Sentence Fiction prompt, “CHARMED,” from Lillie McFerrin.
I wrote this entry on my morning commute on Friday, so it’s about 20 minutes’ worth of concentration and typing. I didn’t bother with any editing or refining. I’m not making any apologies for it, either. I’ve decided that, if a prompt doesn’t inspire an idea within 5 minutes, I let it pass. If I do get an idea but I can’t make it materialize properly in 30 minutes, I set it aside in my ever-growing “Random” folder. No offense intended to the folks posting these lovely prompts – or those participating more fully than I’m doing – but I want to concentrate on my larger writing goals. For me, this plan is a nice balance.
Do be sure to visit Lillie’s site for more Five Sentence Fiction submissions, though, and for other flash fiction goodness!
How do you balance between all the stories in your head?
A most interesting take on the prompt, and I think the largest collection of five sentences I’ve ever seen that was well-written and grammatically correct.
I didn’t initally place this as part of your Stowaways until I read the tag, then I could instantly see where Lelie would be. Perhaps a look into her training or one of her past targets before Stoll.
Excellent work Mayumi!
Actually, this is better suited to Zera and Aral I think. ^^;
A completely different idea. Very well written. Bravo.
A very unexpected, unique take of this prompt!
I tend to draw a blank when presented with a prompt, so I’m impressed by writers like you who can be so creative with them! As for all the stories in my head, well, I think some of them decided to take a summer vacation. 😉
Did you look that one up? I saw someone accessed the story yesterday. 😉
Yes, it’s meant to be Aral and Zera. The progression of the prompt inspiration in my head actually went: “Hm. Charmed. Snake charmer. LIke a snake, oiled, shining, sweating. Dancing. Zera!” 🙂
Glad you enjoyed it, Shade. And, good to see you taking part in a prompt this week, too! Most of my fellow bloggers seem to have abandoned them. Nothing wrong with that, of course – we all have to follow our own bliss – but it’s always nice to see a fellow simple writing post.
I know what you mean, JM! Though, even with them taking a snooze, some of my stories still make me sit in front of my computer, sketch book, or note pad. Enjoy your vacation, though. It likely means they will all find a (most inopportune) time to bombard you with ideas! 😀
Thanks, Barbara. My mind is a bit off-center, I’ll admit. Glad you enjoyed it, though. 🙂
Thanks, Ann. I mentioned to someone else, I often stray left of center with these prompts. 😉
I like your “rule” that if a prompt doesn’t inspire anything within 5 minutes, you pass on it. I think that makes a lot of sense. I find it very difficult to write on command, and that’s how I view prompts. Because it was someone else’s idea, it isn’t organic (for me), and so I often struggle to find meaning behind the prompt.
I think you always do a nice job with the prompts though!
Guilty as charged. Had to look up how to spell Zera’s name again. ^_^;
Still, the thought progression makes sense to me, since Zera is a one of a kind character in your universe(s).
That “rule” may be a bit harsh, but it’s one of the best ways I’ve found to keep my “real” writing on-track. I mentioned before to someone, I think prompts are primarily designed for people who want to practice writing but have no larger projects going on, or who need that extra push toward inspiration.
Thanks for stopping in, Kate!
I had just noticed the hits on that same day you commented and figured that must have been it. 😉
Thanks so much again for giving that sci-fi story a shot, by the way. I’m slowly making some updates/changes to the plot, based on some feedback, but it is taking time. I’m hoping to make it a much stronger story than it was, even if I never push it into an agent’s or publisher’s hands. I certainly owe you many thanks for your support throughout the process. 🙂
But of course. I thought it was a fun story, and I look forward to see what edits/expansions you have in mind for it.
I also haven’t forgotten about the Fearless review, and plan to get to it starting next week once I’m settled into my new place